8 Survival Strategies Neurocomplex Children Develop in Narcissistic Homes

— and How They Echo in Adulthood

Growing up as a neurocomplex child in a narcissistic home is a collision of profound sensitivity and emotional neglect. Where neurodivergence often requires attunement, flexibility, and validation, narcissistic parenting tends to offer rigidity, emotional invalidation, and conditional love. The result? A child who learns to survive by shaping themselves around someone else's needs — often at the cost of their identity and nervous system regulation.

In my clinical work with neurocomplex adults — individuals with ADHD, autism, sensory sensitivity, and complex trauma — these survival strategies show up as deeply ingrained behaviors that once protected but now restrict. Below, I explore eight of these strategies in greater depth, including how they develop, how they persist, and how healing might begin.